never mind the quality, feel the width


Is the name of a 1960-70’s British sitcom about an Irish and Jewish tailoring partnership that was low on quality.  It might also be a description of the Internet when it comes to relationships.

“I’ve been trying all my life to find out what my limits are and have never reached them yet.  But then the universe doesn’t really help, it keeps expanding and won’t allow me know it entirely.”*

“You know after any truly initiating experience that you are part of a much bigger whole.  Life is not about you henceforward, but you are about life.”**

The future is going to be about relationships first and connections second.  We’re going to be in a lot of trouble if we get this the wrong way around.   Just today, within a few breaths of each other, two stories on the news – the Children’s Commissioner for England reports that children are being left to fend for themselves online, and a footballer is sacked after tweeting horrible things about another footballer’s stillborn child.

There’s certainly more connection but the quality isn’t very good.

‘Networked, we are together, but so lessened are our expectations of each other that we one feel utterly alone.’^

Danish used to mean bacon but now we’re getting into hygge (hoo-gah) – wellbeing marked by atmosphere (turn the lights down), presence (be fully here, so turn the phones off), pleasure (cake and chocolate and …), equality (we not me), gratitude (soak it all in), harmony (leave competition behind) comfort, truce (no dramas, please`), togetherness, and shelter.’^^

In-between our adventures, we all need experiences of physically being together – where quality of relationship is high.  Whilst our minds are relentlessly voyaging, our body can only be in one place.

‘Connection is the energy that is created between people when they give and receive without judgement.’*^

Technology isn’t going to go away – and, hey, we enjoy it – we need to develop our relationships as well as our networking, and hygge – ‘”consideration”, “mood”, “comfort”, “hug”, and “wellbeing” may all be words to describe elements of what hygge is today’^^ – is going to be a very useful contribution to life on earth for many of us, so turn the lights low, stoke the fire, serve some cake, enjoy each other’s stories and just encourage one another to be more and more ourselves.

(*The character J, quoted in Paulo Coelho’s Aleph.)
(**Richard Rohr, quoted in Brene Brown’s Rising Strong.)
(^Sherry Turkle’s Alone Together.)
(^^From Meik Wiking’s The Little Book of Hygge.)
(*^From Brene Brown’s Daring Greatly.)


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