Two interesting words:
noun: sham; plural noun: shams
1.a thing that is not what it is purported to be.“our current free health service is a sham”
late 17th century: perhaps a northern English dialect variant of the noun shame.
As I finish the year, I find myself thinking about “the vulnerable way” as something necessary to being Human: to be open to others, to the world, and to our future Self. One of the carcinogens to vulnerability is certainty – when certainty is impermeability to the new, the more, the different. Certainty is a sham when we pretend this is that, our personalised Wizard of OZ hiding behind the curtain in feigned invulnerability, rather than standing in front, admitting what we can and cannot do.
Sham is interesting because it possibly derives from the word shame – the thing we feel when we caught out, when we fail, when we let others down – the thing Brené Brown want us to be resilient to.* Shame is what we fear most if we’re to make ourselves vulnerable. So we hide, we become a sham. We lie to ourselves first, telling how this is this best route to take, but what we don’t see is what it leads to.
chaotic, disorganized, or mismanaged.“the department’s shambolic accounting”
Shambolic does’t derive from the same place as sham, but they feel linked in the following way. To live a sham-life leads to disruption and even chaos. From shambles, we can shamble along, shuffle and stumble. We can never be fully present to others and the world around us because we don’t know who we are and what we have to bring.
The truth is, we’re all moving from this state of shamness to something more authentic, integrated, and whole.
Today will throw many opportunities to avoid shamming it and to go for real instead – which may feel way more vulnerable, but it also allows the genius of you to flow. And this is what the world wants to see.
(*Brené Brown wants us to be able to distinguish between shame, guilt, humiliation, and embarrassment.)