A startover is an amazing thing: to have the opportunity to begin again, to bring our learnings whilst wiping out the mistakes and failures.

The thing is that you have a pocketful of them to hand out to others.

There’s no monetary cost and you’ve already paid the price of becoming the kind of people who will listen to others deeply, ask humble questions, see the truth others may not be able to see in themselves, and offer your particular support.

ask a dumb question with an open mind*
(Rory Sutherland)

Rules are great when they help us move through the day smoothly and without a lot of the hassle of wondering about things like who should go first or clean up after themselves, or where on the escalator we ought to stand.

And, of course, the best rules are those that externally work with our internal rules

What we can lose, though, through an overdependence on rules, is the development of our internal ones, which are often more complex, imaginative, empathetic and creative.

It’s always worthwhile questioning rules, why we do things the way that we do. Many only exist because no-one is willing to ask the dumb and simple question. We might come to an answer we never imagined.

(*From Rory Sutherland’s Alchemy.)

A few years ago, a small crowd of friends gathered a couple of times around the reading of Seth Godin’s It’s Your Turn, to explore the possibilities of what we might get up to for the good of others.

Somebody came up with the title #libraryofawesome for our endeavour and it has remained an experimental project for me.

It directly led to the last two VOXedinburgh events, focusing on telling our stories and making a difference for others, involving many of the people who’d originally gathered.

I’m beginning to wonder, What next?

It’s people that make the most incredible libraries of all – books, DVDs, podcasts are all extensions of people. We have so much to offer collectively, but also individually, making ourselves available to another can make a huge difference.

Yelling at the ref because you don’t like a call against your team is not nearly as effective as insisting that your team train harder or find a better strategy.**
(Seth Godin)

Don’t wait for permission to express your potential, you already have permission.

Moving every day in the direction of your curiosities and fascinations means you’ll discover the things you have no idea about in this moment of time.

Around fifteen years ago, I was reading about how, if you’re 45 years old and people are still speaking about your potential, you need to excuse yourself, find a cupboard to step into and weep.

Erwin, who wrote these words, helped me take a leap towards doing what I really wanted to do but I didn’t know it. And it all followed a conversation in which we found ourselves talking about the things that fascinated and intrigued us both.

Come to think of it, that conversation took place in Los Angeles. I’d travelled for an event I believed I needed to get to, but as I couldn’t afford a hotel, Erwin and his family put me up.

Forget potential, keep moving:

You and your environment are extensions of each other.^

(*Morgan Freeman’s character Monte Wildhorn in The Magic of Belle Isle.)
(From Seth Godin’s blog: The process vs. the outcome.)
(^From Ben Hardy’s Willpower Doesn’t Work.)

I’ve lived through six recessions and learned two big lessons: 1) fear and anxiety will paralyse you if you are not prepared, and 2) a crisis that forces you to stop, just stop, can be a meaningful moment to learn and prepare for your next stage. In hindsight, recessions (and other types of crises) pushed me into my most creative roles […].*
(Bruce Nussbaum)

It’s a rain-all-day Friday.

There’ll be no blue sky today, no sunshine, not even wind.

A perfect day to turn back to a blog from Bernadette Jiwa with the picture of a little girl and her pink guitar, eyes closed, singing her heart out.

Here’s the blog; go take a look at the picture:

It’s easier to be heard when we shout. But being heard needn’t be our ultimate goal.

What if we aspired to be listened to instead?

To be embraced rather than just noticed.

To be valued rather than used.

To be sought out and remembered.

To be recommended and treasured.

To be loved.*

Today’s a wonderful day, full of so many possibilities, because we are capable of filling today with these things: so many ways to listen, to embrace, to value, to seek, to recommend … to love.

(*From Bruce Nussbaum‘s article: How to Recession-proof Your Creative Practice.)
(**Bernadette Jiwa’s The Story of Telling: Being Heard is Overrated.)